Paul Basenfelder
I work with professionals in recovery who are exhausted from carrying far more than anyone realizes. Most of my clients are dependable, high-functioning people who hold everything together on the outside while privately battling alcohol, substances, compulsive habits, or severe burnout. They’ve spent years performing competence while white-knuckling their way through daily life. Asking for help in a high-stakes professional world carries real fear: reputation risk, perfectionism, and deep-seated shame. In my practice, you will not be lectured, managed, or judged. We bypass the performative mask to look directly at the pressure, the strained relationships, and the isolation that comes from coping alone.
Through our work, clients often gain freedom from destructive patterns, greater clarity about their values, and a stronger connection to themselves and others.
As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, my approach is practical and collaborative. Whether you are navigating early sobriety, maintaining long-term recovery, or simply trying to stop running on high alert, our goal is clear: dismantle the shame, restore your autonomy, and build a stable, grounded life that actually feels like your own.
First session
Your first session is a steady, collaborative conversation—not an interrogation, and certainly not a place where you have to perform. While we do complete a comprehensive clinical intake to map out your background, medical history, and immediate safety, we do it conversationally. You set the pace. We look at the full picture of what you're carrying—workplace burnout, relationship friction, recovery struggles, or simply running on empty—so we both understand the terrain. My job is to listen for clarity, not flaws. You will get a clear sense of my style immediately: calm, unvarnished, and completely free of judgment. We won’t sugarcoat reality, but you will never be shamed. By the end of our first fifty minutes, you'll have an immediate drop in internal tension, a clear clinical baseline, and the relief of knowing you no longer have to white-knuckle this alone.
Strengths
My primary strength in the room is unshakeable steadiness. Having done the grueling work of recovery and clinical crisis care myself, I don’t get overwhelmed by intensity, grief, or complex trauma—I help you make sense of it. Clients work with me because I cut through the noise quickly without judgment, clinical posturing, or pretense. I understand the specific exhaustion of chronic self-reliance: holding down high-stakes responsibilities while privately managing fear, shame, or compulsive coping mechanisms. I bring sharp clinical instincts, total confidentiality, and zero demand for perfection—just a steady, grounded partnership focused on helping you stabilize and reclaim your autonomy.
Ideal clients
My ideal client is a high-functioning professional who is exhausted from being the strong, dependable one in every room. On paper, you have it together. In reality, you are quietly running on empty—navigating addiction, compulsive habits, relentless anxiety, or severe burnout behind closed doors. You’ve spent years managing other people's needs while carrying an unyielding sense of self-reliance, and the strategy of simply "white-knuckling" through the week has hit a wall. You aren’t looking for polite small talk, generic breathing exercises, or clinical jargon. You want an unpretentious, confidential space with someone who respects your intelligence, isn't rattled by your mess, and cuts straight to the root of what’s driving the cycle. You don’t need to have things figured out, and you certainly don’t need to perform here. You just need the willingness to put down the armor, tell the truth, and do the practical work of rebuilding a life rooted in genuine stability and self-trust.
Treatment methods
Acceptance and commitment (ACT)
Healing isn’t about endlessly fighting your thoughts or waiting until anxiety completely disappears to start living. Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), we focus on changing your relationship with painful emotions rather than letting them run your life. We work together to clarify what genuinely matters to you—your core values, not the expectations handed down by family or society—and build the psychological flexibility to take meaningful action, even when fear or discomfort is in the room with you.
Cognitive Behavioral (CBT)
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) often gets reduced to worksheets and generic positive thinking. That is not how I work. In my practice, CBT is a practical, collaborative tool to help you identify the invisible scripts, inherited guilt, and automatic patterns keeping you stuck in survival mode. We won’t just talk about what’s going wrong; we’ll map out the mechanics of how your thoughts, physical sensations, and behaviors feed into one another. Together, we deconstruct the beliefs that drain your energy and build concrete, realistic strategies you can actually use in your day-to-day life to regain a sense of clarity and control.
Motivational Interviewing
True change cannot be forced, coerced, or lectured into existence. If you are struggling with substance use, compulsive habits, or burnout, the last thing you need is someone telling you what to do. My approach to Motivational Interviewing is entirely collaborative and shame-free. We slow down and look honestly at the mixed feelings, fears, and friction keeping you stuck, helping you reconnect with your own internal reasons to shift patterns on your own terms.
Somatic
Chronic stress, family trauma, and years of high-pressure survival don’t just stay in the mind—they lock into physical tension and a chronically activated nervous system. If your body is stuck in fight-or-flight, cognitive insights alone often aren't enough to feel grounded. My approach to somatic and mind-body work is practical, not mystical. We pay attention to physical cues of distress, chronic bracing, and exhaustion, using tangible tools to downshift your nervous system and build genuine biological calm from the inside out.
Location
Virtual sessions
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Licensed in
- ConnecticutLicense 58.013705
- FloridaLicense SW25971
- PennsylvaniaLicense CW020853